Its a bright sunny day today so I told myself I had to go out into the garden! I don't usually need encouragement, but I have totally lost the will to be out there. I could go as far as saying 'I Hate Gardening'!
I know you think my garden looks good, but to me it looks a right old mess. I remember when we first moved in and it was all lawn, so the girls could play, camp, cycle etc etc it used to look so big. Now its claustrophobic!
I had to top up the coal bunkers with the pre-packed coal so moved these bags from here

to here,

which of course I shouldn't have done becuase of my back, but I can't wait for hubby as he is having to work exceptionally long hours nowadays!
Under these bags I found three of these



I plan to put the cat trap here,

as we still have not trapped the wretched feral cat. Although I have a plan B if this doesn't work as when I tidied up the front garden there was a strong smell of un-neutered tom and I haven't smelt it in the back garden for awhile now!
So moving down the garden I raked up the leaves. Leaves and gravel do not go!

I moved this

and found this...

we have always had newts since we had the pond, I just haven't seen any for ages and ages. So I very carefully replaced the pot!
Now you would have thought it would have cheered me up to see these frogs and newts and yes to a certain extent it does.
So I moved further on to rake up the leaves from the lawn,

normally I enjoy being out looking at what is about, how I can improve on last year, what might work better etc etc. but the spark ain't there.


Behind the greenhouse is a right old mish mash of mess clutter, some of it rubbish some of it to be used again.



I think since my back I am scared to be laid up, it only takes that one stretch too many and I am on my back, so to speak. I want to do so much but I hold back, so becuase of this I am suppressing my enjoyment.
I think also there comes a time when you don't know where to start or what to do and usually inspiration will come in the shape of a friend or family member.
I have always enjoyed doing something different in the garden, but I'm wondering if it is the right thing to do. Maybe I should go back to the good old cottage garden. Get rid of the big greenhouse which does take up an awful lot of room. But I know me, the preverbial butterfly, maybe I should wait a little while longer and see.
I think I could save up my pennies and egt some help in the garden next year to do the heavier jobs that I can't do and lets hope my enthusiasum returns!